Dum Spiro Spero
"While I breathe, I hope"
Hey y’all …
Raise your hand if you’ve missed unnecessarily long diatribes on chasing a dream, overly detailed recaps of mediocre golf, and completely useless parentheticals that any editor worth their salt would redline immediately (only after cursing me out for using a sixteenth ellipses in a post when zero would have sufficed).
At long last, I am back .. with news. Big news in fact.
Before I get there though, let’s take a quick (I promise) spin through the last year or so and catch y’all up on what’s been happening …
Fortunately, I can sum most of it up succinctly in three bullets:
Work
Chasing two children under four around the house doing my best to make sure they don’t hurt themselves, each other, the dogs, or Kaylie
Making a monumental decision to change our lives dramatically
Yeah, there has been a little competitive golf in between the madness (cashed a check at the NH Open, missed the cut at the Mass Open, played sh*tty at the Providence Open, 73-71 at RI Open to finish middle of the pack), but it certainly took a back seat to a loaded work schedule and being a Dad.
Kaylie and I managed to escape the madness of it all in September to go to Puerto Rico where I put together three (VERY low stakes) rounds in the 60’s on the course where they play the PGA Tour event down there each year. That was a highlight of a late summer/early fall golf season where I didn’t hit a competitive shot after August 2nd.
More importantly though, that trip gave us an opportunity to talk about more than just who was going to change the next diaper and really dive into what was working and what wasn’t. We knew we couldn’t be happier with the family we had cultivated … a happy healthy marriage, the kids, the dogs … it was what we both dreamed of growing up.
But we also knew we were spending far too much time focused on certain elements of life that didn’t spark joy in our lives. She was starting to deeply question the nature of her work and how it dictated every waking moment of her life. I was enjoying my work with an amazing group of people, but naturally felt a longing to be competing and grinding on my game to accomplish the dreams I had for myself.
I clearly had these emotions before (hence why this Substack exists), but it was really interesting to hear Kaylie express thoughts about what our lives could be like if WE stepped away from it all. This was coming from possibly the only person I’ve ever known who truly, absolutely, 100% 95% LOVED her job from the day she started it back in 2017.
So we sat there by the pool and started dreaming. How can we see the world? Where would the ideal place to live be? How could we broaden our kid’s horizons and provide them with an experience beyond the classic America-centric childhood? How could I play more golf and what could we do to get Kaylie more dedicated time with our children? How could we eradicate the wave of fear or panic that washed over us every time we got a new work email from a difficult client? (okay, okay … I’m being dramatic now)
In other words, how could we dictate the terms of our own lives?
We didn’t make any firm decisions that trip … other than coming to an agreement that we were open to alternatives. We kicked around ideas for the next three months until omens (shout out to everyone who has read and re-read The Alchemist) and opportunities started piling up in rapid succession right around Christmas. Before long we had made a decision.
The pre-work was not for the faint of heart. Research, financial modeling, soul-searching … if something truly mattered, it made it into one of our spreadsheets. Honestly, it was invigorating. The excitement over often mundane planning was a sign that we were heading down the right path.
We spent the month of January and early February communicating our plan to our immediate family and closest friends and then held on for dear life as we dealt with a roller coaster of emotion.
We were showered with a bit of love, massive amounts of excitement in small pockets, and more than a little cynicism from close family members. Our decision had clearly struck a chord and emotions ran rampant for a few months amidst our familial circle. The negative reaction from the vocal minority created some difficult moments, but honestly helped cement our decision and bring Kaylie and I closer together. It was the ultimate stress test on what we truly wanted for our family and our lives.
Fast forward a few months and we are putting the finishing touches on logistics to make a very big move. Sell the house, sell our cars, sell our furniture, book flights, mentally prepare two small children for a massive life change, yada, yada, yada. Oh … and do all this while working full time AND getting as much golf practice in as possible. ‘Whirlwind’ is the subtle way to describe the past few months. ‘F*ckin bonkers’ is probably the more appropriate turn of phrase.
So now you know the why … let’s chat about the where and what.
Drumroll please …
On August 1st, the Andrade family will be touching down roughly 10,500 miles away from home in Melbourne, Australia to start the next phase of our lives and careers!
I will be pursuing professional golf again (nearly) full time while Kaylie focuses on enjoying being a mom of two small children and exploring our new world for a while before considering other career options. We have the added bonus of being surrounded by my Australian family (grandparents, uncle, cousins and the extended family) and finally having a chance to reconnect with a group of people we’ve primarily known through phone calls and FaceTimes.
A lot of folks have asked us how long we will be there. The honest answer is we simply don’t know. We are committing to this for a multi-year period of time at minimum. Who knows how things will play out, but we wouldn’t be going there if we didn’t think it was somewhere that we could see ourselves for a time period measured in years, not months.
The other big question I’m getting asked is something along the lines of “what has changed since you decided to give up golf full time and go back to work”? This one is a bit more nuanced and I’ll dive into it in more detail in future posts, but the summary level explanation here is fairly simple …
I let fear and uncertainty get the better of me back in October of 2022. At the end of September, I ran out of playing opportunities up in the Northeast and knew my next local event wouldn’t be played for another seven months thanks to the frigid winter. We had Lorena in late October so travel to warmer climates was out of the question. I honestly panicked in the moment, knowing that I needed to be there for my family.
I justified stepping away from the pursuit using models and spreadsheets about time spent practicing and my inability to be selfish with my time, but really it just came down to a lack belief in myself and my original plan. An amazing opportunity back in the corporate world with my colleagues at MERU came across my desk around the same time and it was a perfect storm of factors that made me withdraw into my natural conservatism.
With our move to Melbourne, I’ll be taking advantage of some incredibly exciting playing opportunities that have manifested over the last six months in a climate where I don’t have to worry about taking a 5-6 month break from outdoor practice. Kaylie’s temporary retirement also creates a slightly easier environment for us to be flexible in terms of travel around the country to chase tournaments or even just simply getting more time to practice while at home.
I talked a lot about responsibility in my “Pivot” post. To be clear, I still strongly believe it is my responsibility to provide for my wife and kids (and dogs). I take that extremely seriously. I’ve been blessed this past eighteen months to be a part of the MERU family and I’ll continue to do a bit of work with them from afar. I also have some more VERY exciting news related to MERU that I’ll share in a future post … but let’s just say the Partnership there has made it extremely clear I have their support and I could not be any more grateful.
“Dum Spiro, Spero” - While I breathe, I hope.
The essence of the adventure on which we are about to embark can be summed up in those three simple Latin words.
Life is meant to be lived and passions are meant to be pursued. We are choosing to reject societal norms and status quo to be radical in the pursuit of personal and familial fulfillment.
We will likely be questioned and we will certainly be doubted … but I can assure you we will be hopeful.
Hopeful that we grow as individuals and as a family. Hopeful we open our kid's eyes to different ways of thinking. Hopeful we feel as though we are dictating the terms of our lives …
… and hopeful that an old man like me can figure out how to knock a little white ball into a hole faster than anyone else … and keep doing it until y’all at home are watching on TV as Kaylie, Jack, and Lorena run onto the 18th green to give me a hug after I make the winning putt.
We are a little busy at the moment as you may have surmised so I likely wont return to my 2x per week posting cadence until we get to Australia, but I promise the next edition of this will not take nearly a year to come out.
As I’ve said a million times before, I appreciate everyone’s support and I look forward to regularly interacting with the Hazards Ascent community again. If you’re new here, subscribe using the button below so you don’t miss future posts!
Speak soon and in the meantime, keep climbing y’all!